आज पंख पहन कर यह पत्तियां फिर उडेंगी
शायद भूल ही गयी थी की
आसमान इतना भी दूर नहीं
की छु न पाऊं
आज पानी में बहती मछलियों ने भी शोर मचाया है
बहुत हुआ बहती लहर के बहाव संग बहना
आज अपना रुख वो खुद चुनेंगी
अब लहर करेगी पीछा उनका
आज सुबह भी शाम सी महकना चाहती है
सूरज के धीमें से छिपने को देखना चाहती है
चाँद से दोस्ती करेंगी
उस सन्नाटे के शोर को महसूस करेंगी
और मैं ..
इस बदलाव को सिर्फ दूर से ही नहीं देखूंगी
आज इनको महसूस करके देखूंगी
Point Blank.
NO, I aint refering to the terminology here, but actually can a 'single point( a dot) be that barren; that empty;that blank?
lets unfurl the story behind the DOT, My way.
There could be thousands of explanations for why a point was given such a high stature.and if you dont understand why did I use the word stature, lets recall the facts: It has the ability to halt, It has the ability to reduce 100 rupee to a mere Re. 1, it was only a point which exploded and Thus came the theory of the Big bang. Those were s few Individual Feats.
As a group of three Dots( Elipses), It gives the statement the power of expression and extension.
Applause.
May be it was a line once, unbound, spirited, aspiring infinity with its strokes. May be it had its dreams of Travelling the globe. But what made it unwind its wings, settle for a single destination for life?
"Mom, get me a water bottle.
Dad, please take out the car fast, I would miss my train.
And you pretty creature, i so love you: dare you not fit this Tee of mine.i can't miss it"
Man! In a country obsessed with dressing , can gals leave even a single peice of their favorite dress at home. Perhaps not.
Well, that was her talking, the one who adored me and owned me.
Since i coudn't really speak, literally that is, i had to fit in her favourite tee shirt.
It was my favourite time of the year. I had been with this pretty young lady for the last two years and one trait which I am so sure bout her, is that she is pretty possesive and has an excellent choice.I have my valid reasons of claiming that : one She choose me, the plain Jane of bags, backpack, humongous or whatever names people called me with, she had the eye to see my beauty, or rather the 'coolness' I carried and picked me from one of the many concrete buildings of the city, I love, she loves and which loves and accepts all, Mumbai. Excellent Choice
and she gave me my position: with her, almost always. and never let me part from her, even when her fav. cusin was asking for it. Possessive.
Can you even Imagine the delight a pithu bag would have being with a gal, almost 24*7. Normally people just find my species to be the one guys would wanna buy and put in useless crap , those torn magazines, a pen may be, or their worn out socks or anything equally untolerable.
Anyways, coming to this time of the year. My owner was pretty much a travelling freak. Was working for the last two years and all I remember except for her working, was her passion for travelling. She would just walk back from work, and announce "i am leaving tomorrow'! She was absolutely crazy when it came to planning Trips which people from my community tell me, that normal people do. She , almost all the time, Didnt. Just packed me up and would leave. and the best part was I got to be with her in despair, in glee in almost every emotion she went through. and perhaps, her mom dad were satisfied, that she aint by only herself, I am always there. her bag, which had most of the things One would need.
So It was one of those many days, I was packed and we just left home. We were headed to Delhi, from where we had to board the Rajdhani to Mumbai. and there we were at Bus station.
Her mom dad waved Goodbye and we started our journey.
The gal and her Travel Bag( that is me).
3.30 a.m , May 2010.
It was an Ordinary bus, the usual thapak thapak and dhuhuuuusshh of it. The ride could have been real tiring, but since it was early in the morning, The sun would perhaps have risen in the Far east of Asia. It was anything but exhausting. the cold winds in peak summers, The early morning greenary, Dew drops , a little drizzle, Could infuse in life even in a dead leaf! it was spectacular. Another instance which proved i was so dear to her: She put everything either in the upper cage like holders or Under the seat , but didnt leave me for a sec. Yes, I did carry some of her very precious Things, but I'd like to the believe the former only. The bus started off. and soon, she was on phone talking to God knows whom. Her mom was repeatedly calling in between .( i know coz she was asking the one on the othe end of the fone call to hold.)
as I said in the start, This was one of the times I loved the most. not only because I got to
cntnd.
Insane , Maniac
looser or a jack
call me whatever you want
blabber, go away or stay.
My love is calling me again.
I am hitting the road.
I have a few penny or sum grands
your consent or a plain reject
My heart's loud cheer or The world's criticism
nothing would affect.
Nothing would hit the inner bang
that calls me back
that calls me on the roads
I aint no man, no women infact
today let me just be the vagabond I'd been in my dreams
Im gonna live my dream
I am on my feet
I am hitting the road!
Love is an over hyped Illusion.You create a world which never would be real. and most of the time , are lost in that concocted world.
He shattered my world. not only my dream world. he distorted my reality as well. My hatred for 'love' has surpassed my 'love' for him.Now It's a derogatory feeling, by mere mention of my feelings for him, I sink deeper in guilt.They say, one never repents after loving somebody. I say, one gains nothing more than just the pleasure of sight, rush of adrenaline, some unnecessary smiles and infinite unreciprocated moments. That's why I hate love.
I was too much into him that I helped him distort my reality, my sanity, the innocence of my thought, my uncrafty smiles. I let him be the parasite, feeding on my love struck heart. I let him suck out life out of my system. it was only him residing in the head. Like a master who aspired to be pleased, entertained, to be given wealth of moments and emotions, which he could kick at his own free will. I allowed all that, consiously delighted.
So, my hatred for him is nothing even close to my hatred for myself. My own bloody self.so, I've planned my end. a cold blooded Suicide, one might call it. But it'll be gradual. piercing slowly, very slowly, taking out every single drop of blood.
No Blood. No Heart.
finally, No heartbeat.
Closure.
No longer I believe in your mesmerising eyes, which hinted amore
No longer I feel your undone touch, your holding my hand which I thought asked me not to go
No longer I hear those unsaid words which told me you missed me much more than I thought
No longer I sense you walking beside me on the toes, when I feel lone
No longer I reside in the warmth of your embrace, which never let me weep
No longer I dream of you and me, hand in hand walking by the sea
No longer I find you in front of me, when my heart beats to get a glimpse of you
No longer I find you kiss away my tears, which now just dry away
The you:who never said a word, who never hugged me tight, whose heart never skipped a beat thinking of me, who never held my hand n walked me through
you who could only be the recepient
I never wanted to
but I guess, Im over you!
